servant leadership

Throughout all of high school, I was involved in student council and the school's freshmen orientation programming and National Honors Society and the green week committee and all of these organizations and clubs that had a couple of things in common. First, they were great experiences to put on a college application and they all offered opportunities to serve. While I acknowledge that being able to say I was a part of these organizations helped me as an applicant, it bothered me so much when that was the motivation for people to become involved, so for me, it was the service opportunities that I was in search of. After reading the scriptures, working through my Personal Progress, and living in a family with eight other people, I knew that serving others was not just the purpose of each of us, but my divine purpose and I was eager to finds ways to do so.


When I saw that Brother Cox's lecture on Monday was on being a servant leader, I was so ready to hear it because its something that I am truly passionate. I cannot say that I was passionate about planning the prom or counting votes for homecoming royalty, but fundraising to grant the wishes of children from the Make A Wish Foundation, that I could put my whole heart into. Although I had hear much of what he said before, I was really interested that he mentioned that while the results of serving are usually good, it is possible to selfishly seek to serve. If I am serving someone in the hope of gaining something back from them, then its not serving. I couldn't help but think back to the beginning of the semester when I was so ready to find the organizations at Y-Serve that I wanted to get involved in. I read through all of the pamphlets and even sent emails to a couple of the groups. I didn't receive any replies and the voice in my head saying if they don't reply, to call them began to disappear beneath the papers and midterms. So am I a selfless servant, or do I only do it when its convenient or when I can see some sort of future incentive for it?


I was truly disappointed with myself, but Wednesday's lab class was a chance to get back into the servant mode...by giving out cookies to students coming out from finishing their tests in the testing center. I knew that if I had been one of them, I would have stared at our class, frantically pretended to be on my phone, and walked away as quickly as possible. I thought that we should be doing something more to help people in the community and not just students. I am happy to say that I was proven wrong. Yes, it was a lot of fun for our class to hand out the cookies, but even if it was a little unexpected, people seemed to appreciate it. I realized that while it is really great to serve those that have a less fortunate life than you, the people close around you need to be served as well.


And none seem to be closer than my roommates, remember, the ones that I'm having so many problems with lately.I remember a talk that a girl in my stake gave in the Young Women's meeting on my trek. She said that when we have enemies and we don't know how to resolve the problem, serve them. I remember that because I knew she was right, but that I also struggle with that. I guess that that is the point of being here and being in this class. I need to work on my weaknesses and hopefully strengthen myself and those that I lead, and in this case, my roommates. I really wish that I knew how I was going to serve them so that I could write it in this post, but I'm really not sure right now. What I do know is that I need to be praying for opportunities to serve my roommates and learn to love them so that we can work through our conflict and get past it.